A coffee "date".

So, tomorrow (Saturday) is my coffee “date” with C. We’re going to meet around 3PM. I’m going into this with a blank slate about it. I’m not thinking too much about what may or may not happen with him. On paper he reads well. He’s 40, single (never married that I know of), has no kids, doesn’t seem to want any either, he’s well educated, he loves to run, and he loves going to concerts. Oh, and he’s not bad looking either. Yes, on paper he’s a good one, but we all know they don’t only exist on paper. We’ve exchanged a few emails since Tuesday and they’ve been nice, but I’m not reading too much into that either.

Truth be told, I’m dreading the moment when he’ll ask me about my living situation. Because when he asks me that it will lead to other questions about my life and I really don’t want to get into it. I don’t want to get into it because I’m pretty sure that once he finds out that I live in my mother’s guestroom he’ll run in the opposite direction. I’m not going to apologize for my life. This is how it is because of everything that happened last year and I’m doing my best with what I’ve been dealt. But he might not see it that way. And, yes, I know that if he has a problem with it, then he’s not worth the trouble. I know this, but there are so few single-never-been-married-has-no-kids-and-wants no-kids men out there that when one happens to fall in your lap (sort of) the goal is to try to keep them interested and not scare them away.

I don’t know. Part of me is a bit anxious about that part, while the other part has an “I don’t care” attitude about it. But like I said, we’ll see how things go.

Oh, who am I kidding? I’ve already begun to sabotage this coffee “date” and it’s not even tomorrow yet.

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