January 3, 2013
I read an article titled “5 Ways Men Break Up With Women and Why“. And after reading it I realized that he’s #4.
4. The Good Guy: You love him almost as much as you hate him.
You hate him because he uses you in the nicest way possible and you can’t do anything about it. You love him. He knows it. You know it. Most women prefer this break-up even though it is not the break-up they need. In fact, it is one of the worst. What women overlook is the fact that The Good Guy is inherently selfish. While he appears to have your best interest at heart, he actually puts himself first and always.
He is so fearful of being labeled a bad guy by you, your family or your friends he rather mislead you than accept this title. Since he never cheats physically, he avoids drawing accusation from you and eases his own subconscious. However, he mentally and emotionally gets a head start on checking out of the relationship before you in order to make his own transition easier.
After the formal “break-up,” he will still make love to you. Sure, you told him you can handle it but you’re lying. He knows, through sex, you are trying to lure him back or at minimum, keep him around. Regardless, he still has sex with you because he places his best interests before yours.
He feasts on your emotional and physical sacrifices until he is gorged but offers you nothing of substance in return. He leaves you feeling empty. He’s honest without ever telling the truth. He doesn’t lie, but he tells you what you want to hear instead of what you need to hear. For instance, when you ask if there is a future for you in his life he gives you an ambiguous response when he knows the clear answer is no….
He uses your hope to keep you paralyzed while he uses the fact that you’ll always be there for him to propel himself forward. You’re left waiting, often in vain, as he gives the love you long for to other women until one of those women finally becomes his wife…
Reading this made me feel sick because this is exactly what he’s done. How could I have let him do this to me?? Why couldn’t I have been stronger???